


But You'll Get Lost In The Challenge (Of Trying Not To Get Hurt)

by thecoloursinthegravel



Series: It's Like The Sirens [3]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Anger, Angst, M/M, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-02 21:46:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10953345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecoloursinthegravel/pseuds/thecoloursinthegravel
Summary: “Luke?”“What’s that smell?” He could barely breath.“What?”“Why do you smell of cologne?”“I wear-““Someone else’s cologne.”





	But You'll Get Lost In The Challenge (Of Trying Not To Get Hurt)

**Author's Note:**

> This is the third part of a series, I'd definitely recommend reading the other parts first so this makes sense! Thank you for reading and I really hope you enjoy! x

The front door creaked open slowly and a voice called from downstairs.

“Luke? You home?”

Luke stayed where he was, sat on the end of the bed, feet firmly on the floor, staring at his hands in his lap.

“Luke?” Ashton asked tentatively as he gently pushed open their bedroom door. He sighed, relieved Luke was safe and home at least. “You’re home.”

Luke just shrugged, still looking at his hands intently.

“I’m so sorry about Michael.” Luke flinched at his name. “But I swear, I _swear_ I never did what he said I did. I swear on my life, Luke. We never slept together.”

Ashton stayed hovering in the doorway, his face full of concern and guilt.

Luke lifted his head ever so slightly, still not looking up very far. “I believe you.”

“You do?” Ashton’s face lit up and he moved quickly to where Luke was sitting. “I- _thank you_.” He let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and enveloped Luke in a hug.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you.”

“No, don’t be, Jesus Christ, don’t be. I’m just so happy you’re home.” Ashton squeezed him tighter, never wanting to let go.

Something in Luke shifted, his muscles tensed suddenly and his heartbeat sped up.

“Luke?”

“What’s that smell?” He could barely breathe.

“What?”

“Why do you smell of cologne?”

“I wear-“

“Someone _else’s_ cologne.”

Ashton’s face dropped, guilt consuming him.

Luke pulled away slowly, hurt and fear radiating from every part of him.

“No.” Luke shook his head, staring into Ashton’s eyes, searching, _pleading_ with him to prove him wrong. To tell him it wasn’t true.

He couldn’t.

“No, Ashton, please tell me you didn’t.”

Tears fell from Ashton’s eyes. “I’m so, so sorry Luke.” He choked out.

“Oh god. No.” Luke shook his head again, standing from the bed and stepping backwards slowly away from Ashton. “Michael.” Luke’s eyes had gone glassy with tears. “You went to him, didn’t you? You went to Michael.”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Ashton whispered, looking up at Luke pleadingly.

“I think I’m gonna be sick.”

Ashton’s eyes were streaming tears now, he was desperately trying to choke back sobs and swallow the horrendous guilt that smothered him. He kept on mumbling “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” under his breath until Luke spoke again.

“What did you do Ashton?” Ashton didn’t look up, just buried his head in his hands. “WHAT DID YOU DO?”

“I kissed him. I kissed him, I’m so sorry, please Luke, I love you, I’m sorry.” Ashton scrambled to his knees to beg at Luke’s feet.

“Get away from me.”

“No, no, please, please don’t do this, please,” he sobbed desperately. “Please don’t leave me.”

“I don’t want to look at you Ashton. I can’t look at you right now.” Luke’s voice cracked through the tears. “I can’t look at you without seeing you with him.”

“Oh god, Luke, I’m sorry, I’m so, so fucking sorry.”

Luke was quiet; still.

“Do you love him?”

“What?” Ashton looked up at Luke, eyes wide.

“I said. Do you love him?”

“I-“ But the look on his face was answer enough.

“Get out.”

“Luke, please!”

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE! Get the fuck out, get the fuck out, get the fuck out!” He screamed, hands balled tightly into fists, tears still racing down his cheeks. “I don’t want to see you again.”

“No, no, no, no this can’t be happening, no.”

“You did this. This is no one’s fault but yours.”

“I know, I know and I’m sorry. I’m _so_ sorry. I’ll never forgive myself, please Luke, you have to believe me.”

“I don’t believe a word you say anymore, Ashton. I feel sick. I feel like throwing up and crying and fucking screaming, and you know the worst thing? The worst thing, the absolute _worst_ thing of all, is that I want to kiss you. I want to fucking kiss you and have you tell me it’ll all be alright. How fucked up is that? I love you so much.” His voice broke, muffled through tears. “And you did this to me. The worst thing you could have done. And you did it. With _him_.”

Ashton was still on the floor, face red from how hard he’d been crying. He sobbed again, “Luke-“

“Get out, Ashton.” He sounded exhausted. “Please, just, get out.”

 

\---

 

Michael was met with a hard-faced Ashton carrying a large duffle bag when he opened his door at two in the morning.

Ashton pushed passed Michael to stand by the suitcase he had packed sitting by the table. Ashton dropped his bag on the floor next to it.

“Where are we going?” He asked, solid form imposing in the room.

“Anywhere you want, baby.”

 

 

 

              

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Run by Nicole Scherzinger


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